Low Melodies
This time I'm far too aggrevated to go into any depth about the Bills. Disappointing game by Bledsoe. Moulds drops an easy 7 pts after making one of the greatest catches in the history of NFL football (this is the story of Moulds' career by the way). Then Moulds tips the ball right into the defense's hands when the game is on the line. Josh Reed drops three passes (the story of his career, as well). McGahee averaging only about two yards a carry most of the game (which, by the way, is at least +2, whereas with Henry it would have been -2.) Offensive line sloppy as fuck as usual, Drew gets harrassed and hammered all game, and has to force his passes. Awful, humiliating coaching decisions.
This I will vent about. I've said since last season - there is one difference between Buffalo and New England. Its not star power or talent. Its fucking attitude. Buffalo loves to play like they've all got shrivled little penises dangling like a soggy fucking wad of clam-goo between their legs. They don't ever ... ever! ... lay it on the line. When you've got a fourth and goal situation at the end of the third quarter and you're down 17-3, and you're playing one of the top defenses in the league - you fucking go for it!! You don't "play it conservative" and "take the three points" and kick the goddamn field goal. You shoot for the end zone. Whats the difference between 17-3 and 17-6? Have you reduced your deficit from two TD's to 1 TD and a field goal? No. You still need two fucking TD's. And what, exactly, are your chances of getting those two TD's against Baltimore's defense when they've been shutting you down all game? ALMOST NOTHING! So when you're there, knocking on the door, you go for it. What's the worst that happens? You don't get it, Baltimore's shitty offense has terrible field position, and you still need 2 TD's. What do you accomplish by kicking the FG? Wow. You gain three points. You still need 2 TD's. That is the embodiment in every respect of why the Bills will never be a competitive team until they undergo a massive philosophy shift. In short, if you want to be a competitive team, you have to COMPETE!
By the way, since Drew will undoubtedly take a lot of heat this week (indeed, some simple minded, hot-headed, blame-throwing folks in this crumbling city are already calling for JP, because every bad thing that happens to Buffalo is Drew's fault (sarcasm)) - but since he will take a lot of heat this week, some of it deserved, I will at least point this out in his defense. Three of his four interceptions came off the hands of his own receivers. Catch the ball and the interception never happens. The only one that was really Drew's fault was the second Deion one in the end zone.
By the way, I fucking hate Deion Sanders. The hell with him.
We should have traded Henry before the deadline. He's useless. His stats were terrible again, and they were really even worse than they ultimately appeared because he had a decent run at the end of the game to pad them. The philosophy at this point is to play him so we can get a better deal for him next season. I agreed with this until this week. But I was mulling it over in that fabulous machine that is my mind and I decided a team will only be willing to give up a little bit extra if he does better the rest of the season. I mean, at this point you can basically forget about getting a first round draft pick for him, so what's the point? McGahee's playing great - start him! And besides, whatever draft pick we may get for Travis will be wasted, as is always the case in Buffalo. We might as well pack him a suitcase and tell him to go leach on to whatever team he wants to make worse and forget about getting anything in return for him. What will we use the pick for, seriously? The lineman we desperately need? We seem not to want to improve that line for some reason, and even when we do pick a guy - vis Mike Williams - he's terrible. A fat fuck, not an athlete.
Some more fun statistics:
Before his last run for 19 yards, Travis Henry had 6 rushes for 8 yards.
Michael Vick - 7/21, 119 yds, and 2 ints, 0tds - God, he's so fucking awesome
Jacksonville's rookie kicker gets booed for faking an injury and then immediately runs out onto the field to kick the ball. Then they say he can't kick because he went off injured, so the crowd boos him again as he goes off - and he taunts the crowd with his arms and spins in a fruity circle!! He's a fucking rookie kicker! Then they change their mind and say he can kick - so the crowd boos him again, and again he taunts them by waving his arms. A rookie kicker! Taunting a crowd! Fascinating shit.
- End football -
A pack of wild dogs broke into a zoo and killed six gazelles. I support any and all attacks on anything by "a pack of wild dogs" - I find it awesomely entertaining. I refuse to apologize for this. I wish more things would get attacked by "a pack of wild dogs."
As per my suggestion, Heinz Kerry has been appropriately locked away in hell, where she will presumably remain until after the election is over. That is to say if Kerry plans on trying to win.
Movie review:
"Team America" is one of the funniest goddamn movies I have ever seen. Oh sure, its no Blazing Saddles. But its fucking funny. Even Jeff Simon, whose taste in movies is baffling, described the flick as "fall-off-your chair funny." Interestingly "Rolling Stone Magazine" chose to argue that this movie reveals Matt Stone and Trey Parker's closet right-leaning tendencies. Huh? Why, because the movie has some fun at the expense of loud-mouthed Hollywood actors? They're part of the issue, and Matt and Trey never leave anyone unscathed. But what about the theme of the movie? Namely, America as "the world's police"? Or the fact that they destroy and devestate entire cultures in their attempts to carry out this policing? How come "Rolling Stone" does not see this as revealing Matt and Trey's "closet left-leaning tendencies"? I'll tell you why - because Rolling Stone is no longer (and has not been for many years now) a legitimate cultural force. Its a full-blown stomping ground for hippies and pot smokers who define their entire existence as simply this - "I hate my parents and I hate George Bush." But at any rate - hats off to Matt and Trey for depicting puppets having sex in every conceivable position, including a strange hand-stand pile-driving type of thing.
A Tom Petty biography is in progress. Oh how I wish I had not found out about this. Why, you ask? Because its not due out until the holiday 2005 season. That means I have over a year to wait for this shit. But this will be good shit though. Its going to be a long series of Tom Petty interviews - and anyone who has read a Tom Petty interview before will truly appreciate the significance of this. He's appropriately cocky and arrogant (as every rock star should be), and he's remarkably insightful and almost like a little kid in his awed appreciation of rock and roll as a cultural and artistic force. He also does plenty of sounding off about his aggrevation with a money-driven culture, and a money-driven pop-music industry, which I have an unending supply of respect for.
Despite my above comments about Rolling Stone, you may want to check out the latest issue. It has two good articles, neither of which have I read yet. But anyway - one is by Hunter S. Thompson, and one is an interview with Tom Wolfe. I read part of the Thompson one - he really is a sad, pathetic parody of himself, and his predictions about the future of politics are as wildly off the mark as ever, perhaps even moreso than they were in the 80's when he predicted Gary Hart would be the next President of the United States and that Richard Nixon would make a comeback before George Bush Sr. would get his party's nomination...but nonetheless his scathing, biting, unreserved style of writing is as entertaining as ever, even if he does refer to "W." as a "treacherous little freak" with "no brains at all." And Rolling Stone did not stop at only one left over relic from the hippie-age of literature - no, they interviewed Tom Wolfe as well, who is a tremendously talented writer. Most of you would probably know him as the author of "The Electric Koolaid Acid Test." I have yet to read Rolling Stone's interview, however, so get off my fucking back and leave me alone until I do.
Alright, lets wrap this horse shit up. I got a 25 page paper to write by Wednesday, and so far I haven't typed a word of it. Not that I care. Fuck school.
Arrivederci ...
Il Pazzo
This I will vent about. I've said since last season - there is one difference between Buffalo and New England. Its not star power or talent. Its fucking attitude. Buffalo loves to play like they've all got shrivled little penises dangling like a soggy fucking wad of clam-goo between their legs. They don't ever ... ever! ... lay it on the line. When you've got a fourth and goal situation at the end of the third quarter and you're down 17-3, and you're playing one of the top defenses in the league - you fucking go for it!! You don't "play it conservative" and "take the three points" and kick the goddamn field goal. You shoot for the end zone. Whats the difference between 17-3 and 17-6? Have you reduced your deficit from two TD's to 1 TD and a field goal? No. You still need two fucking TD's. And what, exactly, are your chances of getting those two TD's against Baltimore's defense when they've been shutting you down all game? ALMOST NOTHING! So when you're there, knocking on the door, you go for it. What's the worst that happens? You don't get it, Baltimore's shitty offense has terrible field position, and you still need 2 TD's. What do you accomplish by kicking the FG? Wow. You gain three points. You still need 2 TD's. That is the embodiment in every respect of why the Bills will never be a competitive team until they undergo a massive philosophy shift. In short, if you want to be a competitive team, you have to COMPETE!
By the way, since Drew will undoubtedly take a lot of heat this week (indeed, some simple minded, hot-headed, blame-throwing folks in this crumbling city are already calling for JP, because every bad thing that happens to Buffalo is Drew's fault (sarcasm)) - but since he will take a lot of heat this week, some of it deserved, I will at least point this out in his defense. Three of his four interceptions came off the hands of his own receivers. Catch the ball and the interception never happens. The only one that was really Drew's fault was the second Deion one in the end zone.
By the way, I fucking hate Deion Sanders. The hell with him.
We should have traded Henry before the deadline. He's useless. His stats were terrible again, and they were really even worse than they ultimately appeared because he had a decent run at the end of the game to pad them. The philosophy at this point is to play him so we can get a better deal for him next season. I agreed with this until this week. But I was mulling it over in that fabulous machine that is my mind and I decided a team will only be willing to give up a little bit extra if he does better the rest of the season. I mean, at this point you can basically forget about getting a first round draft pick for him, so what's the point? McGahee's playing great - start him! And besides, whatever draft pick we may get for Travis will be wasted, as is always the case in Buffalo. We might as well pack him a suitcase and tell him to go leach on to whatever team he wants to make worse and forget about getting anything in return for him. What will we use the pick for, seriously? The lineman we desperately need? We seem not to want to improve that line for some reason, and even when we do pick a guy - vis Mike Williams - he's terrible. A fat fuck, not an athlete.
Some more fun statistics:
Before his last run for 19 yards, Travis Henry had 6 rushes for 8 yards.
Michael Vick - 7/21, 119 yds, and 2 ints, 0tds - God, he's so fucking awesome
Jacksonville's rookie kicker gets booed for faking an injury and then immediately runs out onto the field to kick the ball. Then they say he can't kick because he went off injured, so the crowd boos him again as he goes off - and he taunts the crowd with his arms and spins in a fruity circle!! He's a fucking rookie kicker! Then they change their mind and say he can kick - so the crowd boos him again, and again he taunts them by waving his arms. A rookie kicker! Taunting a crowd! Fascinating shit.
- End football -
A pack of wild dogs broke into a zoo and killed six gazelles. I support any and all attacks on anything by "a pack of wild dogs" - I find it awesomely entertaining. I refuse to apologize for this. I wish more things would get attacked by "a pack of wild dogs."
As per my suggestion, Heinz Kerry has been appropriately locked away in hell, where she will presumably remain until after the election is over. That is to say if Kerry plans on trying to win.
Movie review:
"Team America" is one of the funniest goddamn movies I have ever seen. Oh sure, its no Blazing Saddles. But its fucking funny. Even Jeff Simon, whose taste in movies is baffling, described the flick as "fall-off-your chair funny." Interestingly "Rolling Stone Magazine" chose to argue that this movie reveals Matt Stone and Trey Parker's closet right-leaning tendencies. Huh? Why, because the movie has some fun at the expense of loud-mouthed Hollywood actors? They're part of the issue, and Matt and Trey never leave anyone unscathed. But what about the theme of the movie? Namely, America as "the world's police"? Or the fact that they destroy and devestate entire cultures in their attempts to carry out this policing? How come "Rolling Stone" does not see this as revealing Matt and Trey's "closet left-leaning tendencies"? I'll tell you why - because Rolling Stone is no longer (and has not been for many years now) a legitimate cultural force. Its a full-blown stomping ground for hippies and pot smokers who define their entire existence as simply this - "I hate my parents and I hate George Bush." But at any rate - hats off to Matt and Trey for depicting puppets having sex in every conceivable position, including a strange hand-stand pile-driving type of thing.
A Tom Petty biography is in progress. Oh how I wish I had not found out about this. Why, you ask? Because its not due out until the holiday 2005 season. That means I have over a year to wait for this shit. But this will be good shit though. Its going to be a long series of Tom Petty interviews - and anyone who has read a Tom Petty interview before will truly appreciate the significance of this. He's appropriately cocky and arrogant (as every rock star should be), and he's remarkably insightful and almost like a little kid in his awed appreciation of rock and roll as a cultural and artistic force. He also does plenty of sounding off about his aggrevation with a money-driven culture, and a money-driven pop-music industry, which I have an unending supply of respect for.
Despite my above comments about Rolling Stone, you may want to check out the latest issue. It has two good articles, neither of which have I read yet. But anyway - one is by Hunter S. Thompson, and one is an interview with Tom Wolfe. I read part of the Thompson one - he really is a sad, pathetic parody of himself, and his predictions about the future of politics are as wildly off the mark as ever, perhaps even moreso than they were in the 80's when he predicted Gary Hart would be the next President of the United States and that Richard Nixon would make a comeback before George Bush Sr. would get his party's nomination...but nonetheless his scathing, biting, unreserved style of writing is as entertaining as ever, even if he does refer to "W." as a "treacherous little freak" with "no brains at all." And Rolling Stone did not stop at only one left over relic from the hippie-age of literature - no, they interviewed Tom Wolfe as well, who is a tremendously talented writer. Most of you would probably know him as the author of "The Electric Koolaid Acid Test." I have yet to read Rolling Stone's interview, however, so get off my fucking back and leave me alone until I do.
Alright, lets wrap this horse shit up. I got a 25 page paper to write by Wednesday, and so far I haven't typed a word of it. Not that I care. Fuck school.
Arrivederci ...
Il Pazzo
posted by Il Pazzo @ 3:37 PM
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